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Just for laughs: Ancient breasts, boners and gut busters/PG-13


Ryro
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Posted (edited)

Real quick, this is for ancient laughs. If you don't have a sense of humor or are squeamish...

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For the rest of us depraved and deviant dicks, let the laughs BEGIN!!!

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(You can just here Hera, "Damnit Zeus, you FORGOT to wear pants again!?)

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(Jeez, relax Apollo. It's just a Barley grain!)

SICILY. Leontini, Circa 450-440 BC. Litra (Silver, 12 mm, 0.83 g, 10 h). ΛΕΟ - Ν Lion’s head with open jaws to right. Rev. Apollo, nude, standing left holding phiale in his right hand and branch in his left; to left, altar; to right, barley grain. Boehringer, Münzgeschichte 50. SNG ANS 264. SNG Fitzwilliam 1054. A few rough spots, otherwise, very fine.

Ex: Nomos: Obols

 

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My latest ancient artifact is one that you can pet:

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Not mine, but even more pettable than my new dong:

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Sextus Pompeius.
Denarius, Sicily circa 42-40, AR 19.6 mm, 3.19 g. MAG·PIVS·IMP·ITER Head of Cn. Pompeius Magnus r.; behind, jug and before, lituus. Rev. PRAEF Neptune standing l., r. foot on prow, holding aplustre; on either side one of the Catanaean brothers carrying his father on his shoulder. In exergue, CLAS·ET·ORæ / [MARIT·EX·S·C]. Syd. 1344. B. Pompeia 27. C 17. Cr. 511/3a.
Very rare. Struck on large flan. F-VF Purchased from GN Damian Marciniak October 2021

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Julia Domna Denarius . 193-196 AD . Rome . (Ric- 536 ). Ob .: IVLIA DOMNA AVG, Bust draped to the right . Rev .: VENERI VICTR, Venus standing to the right, leaning on a column, holding a palm and an apple . Ag . 3.18 g. Displaced. Tone . EBC . Tauler & Fau Jan 2021

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MOESIA INFERIOR. Nicopolis ad Istrum. Septimius Severus (193-211). Ae.                                     Obv: AV KAI CE CEVHPOC.
Laureate head right.
Rev: NIKOΠOΛIT ΠPOC ICTP.
Ithyphallic Priapus standing left, revealing himself.              Varbanov 2327-8. Good fine.     2.35 g.18 mm.                             Purchased from Numismatik Naumann Dr. F Jarman collection: Mints of Romthe Roman Empire. March 2021

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The first thing that comes to mind when folks say they don't tooling:

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If you found any of this funny, have funny coins or memes

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Edited by Ryro
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Posted (edited)

And the REAL reason @Ryro left "the other place" comes out! 😆

Um, I have a few things to contribute I think.

Septimius Severus, Nicopolis with Priapos reverse:

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(But @TIF's Elagabalus is... well, much better!)

My erector set also contains this rare A. Pi from Lampsakos.  It's amazing after all the wear and tear he is still keepin' it up:

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A tooled tool (not my coin!) :

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Probably my hottest babe other than my wife (Aurora, that is, not the Gorgon...). Plautius Plancus c. 47 BCE:

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The one that got away (eh @Ryro?) :

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I'll conclude with some auction listings I've enjoyed:

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Some classics from Frank Robinson:

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Edited by Severus Alexander
added "other than my wife" for safety's sake
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Too funny, @Ryro!!

Then there's this antoninianus of T-Bone where the goddess is experiencing a "wardrobe malfunction."

[IMG]
Trebonianus Gallus, AD 251-253.
Roman AR antoninianus, 3.49 g, 20.3 mm, 7 h.
Antioch, unmarked officina, AD 252-253.
Obv: IMP C C VIB TREB GALLVS P F AVG, radiate and cuirassed bust (viewed from back) of Trebonianus Gallus, right.
Rev: VICTORIA AVG, Victory standing right, on globe, holding a wreath and a palm.
Refs: RIC 94; Cohen --; RSC 127b; RCV 9654; Hunter p. cvi.
Notes: Scarce. Only six examples are to be found among the 949 coins representing 11 hoards summarized by Metcalf (p. 87).
 
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I laughed a lot, but that one cracked me up

 

On 6/7/2022 at 9:26 PM, Ryro said:

The first thing that comes to mind when folks say they don't tooling:

mkCKvXy.thumb.jpeg.7ec777d7b288d0a8d9f7a3ed094f4d8b.jpeg

 

This is a joke I like. Not sure how it works for people having english as a native language, but anyway, for myself I find it funny. 

Should any of you be sensitive about religion, maybe it's better to not read further :)

 

- Noah !!

- Yes, my Lord ?

- Noah, you did a damn good job with your ark, and I’m happy with it.

- Oh, Thank you my Lord.

- Don’t interrup me Noah !! Now, I want you to build another ark.

- It’s a lot of Work, my..

- NOAH !!

- Yes my Lord, sure my Lord

- I want you to build another ark, but slightly different from the first one. I would like it to be devoted to carps exclusively.

- CARPS ? But they’re stupid fishes and….

- AND, I would like it to be built on seven floors.

- My Lord, I’m afraid I don’t understand. Seven floors filled with carps. What have they done so great that you feel in need to saving them all from flood. And, also, they can swim on their own, where many others can’t, and…

- Errrmmm, I know, God only knows, but what I mean is that for all my life I've wanted to own a multistorey carp ark..

 

Please, forgive me

:) Q

 

Edit to add : and to keep it coin related, here's a mount Argaeus

c6321633440a45d8b4edbef3d2f5c945.jpg

Plautilla, Provincial drachm - Cappadocia, Caesaraea - Eusebia, AD 205.
ΦΟΥΛΟΥΙ ΠΛΑΥ ΑΥ, draped bust right
ΜΗΤΡΟ ΚΑΙCΑ, Agalma of Mt. Argaeus with star. In ex., CΤΙΓ : regnal year 13 of Sept. Severus, 205 AD
2.69 g, 19mm
Ref : Sydenham -; SNG Copenhagen -; Sear 2775v.
Sydenham-Malloy, p. 152, no. 496b
cf. Lanz auction # 117/956
thanks to Curtis Clay for additionnal information (AFAIK the coin is now in his collection)

Q

Edited by Qcumbor
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1 hour ago, Qcumbor said:

I laughed a lot, but that one cracked me up

 

 

This is a joke I like. Not sure how it works for people having english as a native language, but anyway, for myself I find it funny. 

Should any of you be sensitive about religion, maybe it's better to not read further 🙂

 

- Noah !!

- Yes, my Lord ?

- Noah, you did a damn good job with your ark, and I’m happy with it.

- Oh, Thank you my Lord.

- Don’t interrup me Noah !! Now, I want you to build another ark.

- It’s a lot of Work, my..

- NOAH !!

- Yes my Lord, sure my Lord

- I want you to build another ark, but slightly different from the first one. I would like it to be devoted to carps exclusively.

- CARPS ? But they’re stupid fishes and….

- AND, I would like it to be built on seven floors.

- My Lord, I’m afraid I don’t understand. Seven floors filled with carps. What have they done so great that you feel in need to saving them all from flood. And, also, they can swim on their own, where many others can’t, and…

- Errrmmm, I know, God only knows, but what I mean is that for all my life I've wanted to own a multistorey carp ark..

 

Please, forgive me

🙂 Q

 

Edit to add : and to keep it coin related, here's a mount Argaeus

c6321633440a45d8b4edbef3d2f5c945.jpg

Plautilla, Provincial drachm - Cappadocia, Caesaraea - Eusebia, AD 205.
ΦΟΥΛΟΥΙ ΠΛΑΥ ΑΥ, draped bust right
ΜΗΤΡΟ ΚΑΙCΑ, Agalma of Mt. Argaeus with star. In ex., CΤΙΓ : regnal year 13 of Sept. Severus, 205 AD
2.69 g, 19mm
Ref : Sydenham -; SNG Copenhagen -; Sear 2775v.
Sydenham-Malloy, p. 152, no. 496b
cf. Lanz auction # 117/956
thanks to Curtis Clay for additionnal information (AFAIK the coin is now in his collection)

Q

LOL, cute!  Americans may not get it...  🙂

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Posted · Supporter
8 minutes ago, Qcumbor said:

Archaeologists just found an ancient egyptian mask laying on the ground not far from the pyramids

Pharaon.jpg.449ff4f2a2e9c74dd939cd3d3fcdec33.jpg

Q

Ahh yes. The mask of Jugankhamun.

Egyptian Funny Quotes. QuotesGram

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Waaaaay back to @Ryro's Socrates-Plato-Aristotle-Alexander the Great, this is called for.

 

Too bad they didn't rhyme 'Descarte' with 'Sartre' (..."the old fartre" --that's from the Tom Robbins book with the newly memorable title, Still Life with Woodpecker.)

Edited by JeandAcre
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